Man who kills woman has only one thing in mind: These are creepy thoughts usually leading to murder
There's no end to tragedies in which men decide to take the life of their partners...
A tragedy shocked Serbia yesterday when a member of the Gendarmerie, Pavle R., allegedly blew up the car he was in with his mistress, all because of her decision to return to her ex-boyfriend.
This is just another in a series of cases where men decide to take the life of their former or current partner, even if they have children together.
We can't but ask what's in the head of a man who wants to take a woman's life, even at the cost of also committing suicide
"Every irrationality has its own logic. The logic of these people could be described as follows: 'She is my only love. When she is not with me, I suffer terribly. That's why I have no life without her. She has to come back to me. If she won't come back to me, then she's cruel because it makes me suffer so much. It's not okay for me to be miserable, while she's happy. She is so insensitive. If she won't be mine, she won't be anyone's. By refusing to return she destroys my life and gives me the right to destroy hers'. In other words, the killer wanted her to come back and for everything to end well, and when she wouldn't it had to end badly," Dr. Zoran Milivojevic wrote in a column for the daily Politika, explaining crimes of passion.
Clinical psychologist Aleksandra Jankovic told Telegraf that crimes of passion are mostly due to pathological jealousy. According to her, small indicators of this state of affairs are arguments and questions about previous relationships, which later takes on the form of light control and constant questioning such as "who called you," "where were you," "who were you with," "why did you stay so long," "what were you doing."
"When it comes to taking somebody's phone without asking, looking at the list of calls, messages, making fake profiles on social networks, using them to contact the partner, invite them for drinks, test them - a line should be drawn. Many women don't, they see this monitoring as an indicator of love, while in fact it's something else," Jankovic told Telegraf, adding that that another red flag to end a relationship is a man's obsession with his partner.
According to her, a partner's 100 percent focus on you is not a good indicator of love, although such behavior pleases women at some point.
"The next stage in such a relationship is a greater degree of control, questioning about friends, whether they are really good for her, and all this is done to make the partner dedicated only to him. When a woman is left with no friends, her partner usually tells her that she will never be alone with him, that she has his full support and attention, and that should be a sign that jealousy has reached a serious stage, followed by verbal and physical torture, the first slap, which must by no means be acceptable," Jankovic pointed out, adding that when a woman starts to suspect that something is wrong, she should consult an expert immediately.
Aleksandra stresses that such relationships are based not on love but on possessiveness, that is, on a primitive desire to possess another person. Such complete subordination requires proof of love and, of course, the greater the suspicion that love is deserved, the greater the proof required.
If you are a victim of violence or know someone who is, call 0800 - 35 00 36
(*this is an SOS hotline licensed by the Ministry of Labor, Employment, Veteran and Social Affairs, RZBSP)
(Tara Tomovic/Telegraf.rs)